Annual Christmas Day Pome – Sick Ole St Nick

T’was the Day After Christmas Eve Pome

It’s true so they say that on Christmas day

old St Nick is always sick

from sugar, carbs, inhaling soot

and lunging sacks of children’s loot

Santa has to unbuckle his belt

to make room for cookies, and chocolate gelt

Popping antacids with each milk drink

he’s lactose intolerant, that’s why the wink


Up all night,

by mornings light he’s a fright

The chubby ole fellow, no longer mellow

Back’s in spasm, eyes are red

Climbing to chimney tops, legs like lead

When home he goes, the ho ho hoes

have turned to moans

the silent night filled with grunts and groans

No longer just plump he’s a fat grump


The reindeer too have lost their cheer

for all things festive in the New Year

His packed on pounds during the rounds

create huge drag for even a stag

They huff, puff and wheeze

looking for a stiff breeze

to help carry Santa over roof tops and trees

All the way back the reindeer pray

he’ll loose 50 pounds before next Christmas day

Cuz Rudolph et. al are running out of gas

hauling Santa’s growing ass

  *   *   *

Merry Christmas to all who indulge and bulge!

from judy and Freddie Parker Westerfield

Freddie Parker Westerfield, Published Author

Freddie Parker Westerfield, CDT RET

5 comments on “Annual Christmas Day Pome – Sick Ole St Nick

  1. Goodness, I feel sorry for the poor man in red, his weary reindeer and sled
    Don’t blame me cuz I’ve never participated in dragging that man from his bed
    The worst you can say is I’ve not enough candles and therefore can’t light
    All my eight menorahs, yes, count ’em, eight Hanukkiah for eight days of light
    Tell Santa to give up the late ride and eat chocolate coins wrapped in gold foil
    Safer to spin driedles, tell stories of brave Maccabees and the miracle of oil
    And he’ll feel much better when he rises well rested at the end of this year
    Not having delivered gifts heavier than a wish for peace and good cheer

    Happy, Merry, Joyous Celebrations to you and yours, Judy.


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